Love. Fear. Anger. Emotional Baggage.
Do you know what gets in the way of Love? It’s old emotional baggage 99% of the time, which most often comes in the form of misplaced anger and/or fear.
As far back as I cam remember I’ve been angry at somebody. In one particular case, it was Janine, a friend who stole money from me. I had been mad at her since 1979. It took until 1989 to resolve the conflict. “She was my best friend. I trusted her, and look at what she did to me!” I’d say to anyone who’d listen to me. “I thought she know if she needed something she could just ask,” I cried. But she didn’t. After a few years of replaying the story, I knew just how to tell it to get the kind of reaction I wanted. I had an investment in the anger, even though we had been friends since childhood. I was holding on to my emotional baggage. What I discovered later was that it was fear, not anger that created a block. Fear that manifested itself as anger. I carried that emotional baggage around for a long time, until one day it just got too heavy.
Holding on to the Anger.
Have you ever been mad at someone and allowed that anger to last for years? I bet you have. Think about someone you aren’t speaking to today and go back to how long it’s been. We’re not counting bumping into the person in the street, business meetings, or family events, we’re talking about really having him or her in your life. I bet it’s been a long time, longer than you’d like to admit.
Do you remember why you stopped talking? Or how the disagreement even started? Some of you are probably saying “But it was her fault, or it was his fault.” Or “They stopped talking to me first.” Perhaps you are right, but you have helped to keep the resentment going. How willing are you to make the world a better place by living love, not just talking about it? How willing are you to start the process right now?
People Do Let Us Down.
People let us down, whether or not they know it. They hurt us with their words. They disappoint us with their actions. When they hurt us, we feel justified in holding a grudge – forever. Anger is a powerful intoxicant. You can become so consumed with what someone has done to you, you get angry. The anger gets angry, and the anger gets you.
When I finally resolved the conflict with Janine, it was more for my benefit than hers. I had become more consumed with her than I thought I was.
Getting Past the Anger and Fear to the Love.
So what can you do right now, this moment, to move you closer to loving yourself or someone in your life? Ask yourself what action can you take right now? Join the conversation and share how you’re moving forward on my website, Esteemable Acts Fan Page. Esteemable Acts Twitter Page.